i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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