BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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