A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
