he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Randomize
