I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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