Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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