Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
