Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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