so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Randomize
