Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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