R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize