just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
i am craving dick and cupcakes
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Randomize
