no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
