how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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