Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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