Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
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