i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize