i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
