So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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