New invention idea: vibrating tampons
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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