i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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