your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
