I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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