yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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