i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
