I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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