apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
