just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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