there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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