yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize