Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
