look no pants
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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