I look better un-naked...
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
this is an emotional support booty call
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I touched a dick in church today
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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