I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
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