That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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