You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
