Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
