East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize
