I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
