We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
kristin has been a bad kristin
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
It's shark week go big or go home
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
