i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
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