Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
