Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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