spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize