Non-Jews are for practice
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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