I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
