White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Randomize
