youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize