fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
it hurts more in the daytime
He had one of those small greek statue penises
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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