apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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