As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
